When I was in the market for such things, if two kids became an item it was known as “going out” with someone – but according to the older child, that is So Old, and the kids call it “dating” now… which I thought came from the 1950s… anyway, it’s been a turbulent week round here on the romance front, with soap opera-worthy storylines of romantic suspense for both of the boys (age 10 and 8). The older one decided it was time to end his year-long understanding with his young lady, and the younger one was invited to become a boyfriend on Tuesday – only to decide he didn’t feel he was ready for all that on Wednesday, and that he planned to finish matters on Thursday.

So it seems there will be no Valentine’s cards in the making this year. But did you know that if you, as an adult, are struggling to find the right words for your Valentine, there are copywriters out there who can be hired for that specific purpose? It’s not a line of work I’m prepared to explore, but it’s fascinating to find out what people are prepared to pay for!

I don’t think kids need that service, though. One of the loveliest things about young romance is the purity and honesty of it – they just don’t see a need to complicate things. I had a look for some examples of how children write to their lucky beaux, and as it turns out, there’s a rich seam out there – some real gems that really show off the beauty of kids’ love letters. Here are five of the sweetest, to bring a little sprinkle of innocent Cupid magic to your day.

This kid’s not beating around the bush. Lay it all out there, and see what she says. What is there to lose?

Dear Alexis,

How are you today? I want to inform you that I kind of like you. Don’t laugh, this is serious.

And this one is so sweet – who could resist such an invitation?

We’re really good friends and I would be even happier if you could be my girlfriend. We can play together every day and wave to each other in the classroom. You can come round to my house and play some video games and eat spaghetti and meatballs that my Mum makes.

This one’s pretty breezy…

Hello, I like you. Do you like me? Can we be together? We’ve known each other for a long time so that would be cool.

This one wants to get everything straight from the beginning, then they both know where they stand. I’m in full support of that:

Dear Jessica, I have a couple of questions. Is it too early to start holding hands? Am I at the “Honey” point yet? Let me know if I am rushing you, OK? Thank you for saying yes. The usual answers I get are “No way, are you stupid?” or “I already have a boyfriend”.

And my absolute all-time favourite:

I love you with all my butt. I would say heart, but my butt is bigger.

How on earth do you follow that? I don’t think you can. I’ve certainly got no plans to become a writer of romantic copy, but I might use that last one in my own card this year…

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